TAKE COVER

'blog.' short for 'weblog.'

'intriguing concept.' short for 'gay.'

yeah, most of the blogs i've read are totally gay. there's top 10 baby pictures - gay. venomous postings about how ford mustangs don't come in 5 liter engines anymore because of 'them democrats' - gay. pictures of home improvement projects... top 10 links to local news articles covering the pittsburgh steelers' superbowl victory parade... pictures of babies doing home improvements - i hate them all.

...and youtube linkdumps. everyone videotapes everything now. ergo, people post shitloads of crappy youtube clips on their blog like it's going out of style. maybe it compensates their greed.

their greed for providing the world with nary an original thought. i mean, is it necessary to post a 20-second clip of people laughing at nothing more than a rubber duck with flashing lights inside of it, all the while urging everyone to comment on its sheer hilarity?

yes, the clip exists. what it proves though, if anything, is a total fucking mystery.

it's almost as hilarious as watching a bunch of unanimated, out of touch, self-fellating corporate pricks leeching onto their bogus perception of pop culture; each afraid to give into their (sadly, very real) utter lack of knowledge about well, anything. (shit, actually that's not fair. i'm sure they know about all the lowest local mortgage rates, and the best way to mine data from an multi-threaded archived document management system.) so be fair when you watch them, yammering and 'starbucksing' on at the proverbial water cooler:

PROCESS STRATEGY ANALYST: hey, did you check out that new cheerios commercial during survivor last night?
CRM TEAM LEAD: no, i was having dinner with the ol' ball and chai...
(everyone breaks into laughter for twelve solid minutes. this is followed by an awkward pause)
INFRASTRUCTURE MIGRATION SPECIALIST: but seriously, that was the one where a desheveled ben stiller in a cat suit asked that CGI scooby-doo if that was his 'final answer,' right?
PROCESS STRATEGY ANALYST: that's the one!
CRM TEAM LEAD: no, he did not just go there!
FUNCTIONAL TEST CASE MANAGER: (walking in with a panera bread tote bag) booyah! he totally did!
(more uncontrollable laughter)
FUNCTIONAL TEST CASE MANAGER: so anyways, who wants to come over to my place after the...(*wink*) 'rat races' and meet *my* boring wife, eat some meatloaf leftovers with us, and say hello to my twin boys, john and joe - they just started the 2nd grade, and gosh, their homeroom teacher really...

thankfully, that cheerios commercial doesn't exist...yet.

but these are some of the people that are responsible for some of the most asinine blogs ever. so to inaugurate (or deflower, whatever you prefer) the intarweb with my brand of worthless bullshit, it's only fair that i leave you with something that befits this platform, which i've now hopefully deemed unoriginal, excessive, and stale. i give you a top 10 youtube linkdump of what else - some of the best cover songs in history. naturally.

(but before i roll out:



...fucking hilarious. comment!)